bullies and the bullied

We’ve had this bit of a problem with dropping Fysh off at school in the mornings. In the beginning it was a nightmare which is understandable as it was new and after a while he was okay with it but recently ish he’s become a screaming mess of “I’ll stay home alone” or if I say he can’t I have to work then it’s “I’ll sit in the car when you work” but he adamantly refuses to stay at school and most days I have to literally run out the building and close the door behind me so that he can’t come after me.

Well this morning before school I woke him up and he crawled onto my lap asking not to take him to school so we had a little chat and I coaxed out of him why it is he doesn’t want to go because as far as I can tell he has fun there, he’s grown a lot and his drawing/counting/colouring/jumping etc has really improved since starting school and his teachers all say that he’s a happy and interactive child.

So during our chat the truth came out: “my friends are ugly to me. Hunta does hitted me momma”.
Instantly my momma bear instincts take over and I am insanely protective. Why is this kid bullying my minion and what are the teachers doing about it?!

I had a long chat with his teachers this morning regarding this and they say they know that Hunta is a problem and they’ve been trying to deal with it. I of course demanded it be dealt with better because it clearly isn’t working if my kid doesn’t want to go to school.

Anyone else had a bully issue?
What do you do? I feel so helpless, I’m glad in a sense it’s not MY child who is the bully but that doesn’t mean I take it lightly that he’s the bullied. He has a mean right hook and has only once hit a kid at school but it was an older kid who was picking on a baby. He’s very protective but is at the same time too soft to stand up for himself.

Hate that my minion is going through this :(

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8 thoughts on “bullies and the bullied

  1. Gah, I had a similar issue a few months ago what made it even worse was that the perpetrator’s mom is a good friend of mine. I approached the school about it and the entire thing blew up in my face and the mom and I had a massive falling out.
    It was awful and hurt and made me very sad but ultimately, my job is to protect my child!

  2. I had the same problem with my minion – except she was being bitten by another toddler. Serious bite marks on her chest…regularly! So I showed her how to use punch her bully in the nose, as hard as she could! I told the principal and the teachers that if my minion gets bitten again, the result would be a bloodied nose toddler (and not mine!) in tears. They really didn’t like what I had done. But like I explained to them..I don’t pay school fees for my child to be bitten repeatedly so sort the bully out and all will be fine. They called in the bullies parents and he did stop biting. Everything ended well, but make a noise, raise some hell….things seem to move faster when you do!!!!

  3. I’ve seen kids bullied in my class and the only advice I could really give them is to be strong, always have a friend with them, talk about it as much as possible with their parents and teachers and most importantly I tried to make sure they understood that it had absolutely nothing to do with them. Kids often feel like they deserve it – like if they were cooler or more like their bully, they wouldn’t be the target. Fysh needs to know that that’s not the case – that the bully has his own problems and he’s taking them out on Fysh. There’s that story about the kids who believed the one woman in town was a witch. The one kid went to her to ask how to get rid of his bully. She told him he had to spend an afternoon at his bully’s house. The moment he saw the bully’s issues at home, he started treating his bully differently, and it was reciprocated. It’s a silly little fable, but the point is that bullies have their own issues, and it’s not the one being bullied’s fault. Hugs, lady.

  4. You threaten the child! Kiara was bullied in Gr 1 – the child carried on bullying various girls over the years – the girls had to learn ways to deal with it – it was “easier” because it was more emotional and bitchy!

    If Fysh is touched once more then you chat to the principal and you demand they do something!. Its not ok on any level – EVER!

    I may or may not have glared and scolded a bullying child on a few occasions! Don’t mess with my kids – EVER!

  5. I’m sorry he is going through this! My little ones went through so much bullying (especially Aspie Teen) all throughout school and it really sucks! Unfortunately some of the bullying actually came from the teachers! Sad, I know.

    And Tantrum Tot (2) now has come home with bites a few times, but it seems to be sorted out now. I hate it when kids go through this though. Keep up the good work, keep your little guy talking to you!

  6. Shame, man, that’s horrible. Mitchell was bullied a little at school but I made sure the teachers were aware of it and eventually the bully left the school, not sure if it was forced or not. I worry sometimes that he might bully others himself as he is quite boisterous. Apparently once he hurt a little girl but he insists it was an accident and it hasn’t happened again. I think he bullies the teachers, actually:) he is always being sent to the office for shaking his fists at them. I think we are in for fun and games later on in life!!

  7. Pingback: Bullying and no one is listening | Housewives Magazine

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